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A community for the dragon language of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

Thuum.org

A community for the dragon language of The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

Fantasy creations

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Fronlaasfrin
February 1, 2018

This thread is for people to post their ideas of fantasy stuff (like TES, LOTR, Hobbit, etc.) that they have created.

I've always dreamed of creating something of equal popularity to TES or any big video game series or movie. I am working on a fantasy story roght now for school, but I highly doubt it will reach the magnitude of any fantasy story. I have also created a number of fantasy races and creatures. 

by Fronlaasfrin
February 1, 2018

This thread is for people to post their ideas of fantasy stuff (like TES, LOTR, Hobbit, etc.) that they have created.

I've always dreamed of creating something of equal popularity to TES or any big video game series or movie. I am working on a fantasy story roght now for school, but I highly doubt it will reach the magnitude of any fantasy story. I have also created a number of fantasy races and creatures. 


Hahdremro
February 1, 2018

Oh boy, a place to post all my crazy half-baked worldbuilding projects! I'll have to get back to this, but it would be a great place to talk about all my ideas and give feedback on other people's ideas as well.

by Hahdremro
February 1, 2018

Oh boy, a place to post all my crazy half-baked worldbuilding projects! I'll have to get back to this, but it would be a great place to talk about all my ideas and give feedback on other people's ideas as well.


Fronlaasfrin
February 1, 2018
I would love to hear about all of that, Hahdremro! I have a few works like to finish before putting them here.
by Fronlaasfrin
February 1, 2018
I would love to hear about all of that, Hahdremro! I have a few works like to finish before putting them here.

Fronlaasfrin
February 1, 2018
I am currently working on a story, not done though, but if anyone wants to read it, I'd be more than happy to put a link here.
by Fronlaasfrin
February 1, 2018
I am currently working on a story, not done though, but if anyone wants to read it, I'd be more than happy to put a link here.

Frinmulaar
February 2, 2018
Fronlaasfrin
I am currently working on a story, not done though, but if anyone wants to read it, I'd be more than happy to put a link here.

Please do! Input is everything in these circles.

 

As a tax for posting in the thread, this is rather more scifi than fantasy, but I did once design a humanoid race. The oka were supposedly distant descendants of human colonists on a dim forest world.

by Frinmulaar
February 2, 2018
Fronlaasfrin
I am currently working on a story, not done though, but if anyone wants to read it, I'd be more than happy to put a link here.

Please do! Input is everything in these circles.

 

As a tax for posting in the thread, this is rather more scifi than fantasy, but I did once design a humanoid race. The oka were supposedly distant descendants of human colonists on a dim forest world.


Fronlaasfrin
February 2, 2018

Well, as long as they don' use technology that seems to sci-fi, it could be like an alternate realm.

P.S. here's the link for my story so far: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1B0SYTJdRxvkpF_6RTjpBIkcZPcFkjeB8yqWgD_rcdZY/edit?usp=sharing

by Fronlaasfrin
February 2, 2018

Well, as long as they don' use technology that seems to sci-fi, it could be like an alternate realm.

P.S. here's the link for my story so far: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1B0SYTJdRxvkpF_6RTjpBIkcZPcFkjeB8yqWgD_rcdZY/edit?usp=sharing


Hahdremro
February 2, 2018

Good worldbulding so far. You're making excellent use of "Show, don't tell" for the vast majority of the setup to the story, and I find that to be quite admirable. The whole piece could use some editing, of course, but the dialogue is pretty decent and the concept of the plot is conveyed effectively. The pacing is questionable, though. I can't really fault you for wanting to jump into the action so soon, but the transition from dialogue to fight scene was a bit too abrupt. A bit more imagery could help to smooth that out. Try to imagine the scene as though it were a movie playing in your head, and describe it in as much detail as you can without sounding too long-winded. Some practice and experience should make these minor issues go away soon enough. Just keep writing, and you'll keep getting better and better!

by Hahdremro
February 2, 2018

Good worldbulding so far. You're making excellent use of "Show, don't tell" for the vast majority of the setup to the story, and I find that to be quite admirable. The whole piece could use some editing, of course, but the dialogue is pretty decent and the concept of the plot is conveyed effectively. The pacing is questionable, though. I can't really fault you for wanting to jump into the action so soon, but the transition from dialogue to fight scene was a bit too abrupt. A bit more imagery could help to smooth that out. Try to imagine the scene as though it were a movie playing in your head, and describe it in as much detail as you can without sounding too long-winded. Some practice and experience should make these minor issues go away soon enough. Just keep writing, and you'll keep getting better and better!


Fronlaasfrin
February 2, 2018

Thanks, Hahdremro. Do you have any advice for how to do that. After all this is an assignment for school and it has a due date, so I can't use a lot of time practicing. So if you have anything that you think would help me, I'm open to suggestions!

by Fronlaasfrin
February 2, 2018

Thanks, Hahdremro. Do you have any advice for how to do that. After all this is an assignment for school and it has a due date, so I can't use a lot of time practicing. So if you have anything that you think would help me, I'm open to suggestions!


Hahdremro
February 2, 2018

Honestly, for a school assignment, it's pretty good. You switch between past and present tense a lot without any real reason for it toward the beginning, and I noticed a couple punctuation errors that should be evident if you read through it. 

 

I have a world that I've created, but I haven't fleshed it out much yet. Last time I worked on it was around the time I joined the site. I wrote up a big ol' post about it. Think it would be appropriate here. Gonna copy and paste it here to see if it sparks any fresh discussion. I'll post more about my other ideas when I get a chance. Got some good ones swimmin' around in my head, like an eldritch all-seeing being named Xyndith-Ghol, or a setting in which the landscapes and inhabitants are based on a variety of music genres. I'll get into more detail about those when I have more time. For now, though, here's the post I wrote a while ago about my Awakening setting.

 

I have a concept I've been sitting on for a couple years now. I posted about it in a thread on here well over a year ago, but I haven't really sat down to flesh out the idea any further yet, and I would like more feedback so I can try to make some interesting stories in this original universe. 

I have an idea about a world in which a multitude of mythologies from throughout history have suddenly popped into existence, through a series of cataclysmic interdimensional mergings known as Awakenings. Pantheons from around the world are now tangible, and they are immensely powerful. Japanese kami, Norse gods, and even the heroes of Greek and Roman legends have been forcibly brought into our plane of existence.

With these malevolent, supernatural entities wreaking havoc across the globe, a world government rose to power to fight the hordes of Myths, Gods, and Spirits, creating specialized task forces known as Watchmen (or Watchers) to hunt down the unnatural menace. A Great War ravages entire countries. The previous world order crumbles in a matter of months. Without the protection of the shadowy organization of Watchers, humanity was surely bound to perish. Yet our resilience held out, and we conquered the multitudes of Heavens and Hells, harnessing their raw and mysterious Spirit energy with fantastic machines and newly-discovered arcane rituals.

Years later, the world government (now known as The Overseers or The Protectors) has taken control over a vast portion of the world and is keeping the population in submission through subtle manipulation and constant promises of protection against the now-defeated Spirits. An Orwellian government is subduing any attempts to rebel, and even those Spirits which were peaceful and good are all but extinct.

A rebel movement of Spirit sympathizers scattered across the globe are secretly housing a few remaining Spirits in their homes, in an elaborate Underground Railroad. But the Watchmen are still in power, and they are on constant vigil for even the slightest sign of Spirit activity. Raids of private property are commonplace, and there are Reeducation Camps designed to brainwash uncooperative civilians in most major cities.

With humanity being controlled by the brutal Overseers, the few Spirits left are forced to hide in the homes of the kind humans who are part of the Underground Railroad. Underground bunkers are sometimes built to house these Spirits, but more often than not, they are captured by Watchmen raids and taken away, still "alive," to an unknown location. Even most of the Watchman officers don't know what happens to these Spirits, but they know it's unpleasant. With doubters among their ranks, some Watchmen are sympathetic to the cause of the Underground Railroad. These dissenters are swiftly rooted out and quietly executed.

I have plenty of issues to iron out, such as the sociopolitical and economic situations that allowed for the rise of a single unified government, but I feel like there's potential for plenty of interesting stories to tell in this universe. I've discussed my ideas briefly with a couple of published authors who specialize in worldbuilding, and they've given me some additional resources to flesh it out a bit more, but I'd like more feedback before I put more effort into this. What do you guys think?

by Hahdremro
February 2, 2018

Honestly, for a school assignment, it's pretty good. You switch between past and present tense a lot without any real reason for it toward the beginning, and I noticed a couple punctuation errors that should be evident if you read through it. 

 

I have a world that I've created, but I haven't fleshed it out much yet. Last time I worked on it was around the time I joined the site. I wrote up a big ol' post about it. Think it would be appropriate here. Gonna copy and paste it here to see if it sparks any fresh discussion. I'll post more about my other ideas when I get a chance. Got some good ones swimmin' around in my head, like an eldritch all-seeing being named Xyndith-Ghol, or a setting in which the landscapes and inhabitants are based on a variety of music genres. I'll get into more detail about those when I have more time. For now, though, here's the post I wrote a while ago about my Awakening setting.

 

I have a concept I've been sitting on for a couple years now. I posted about it in a thread on here well over a year ago, but I haven't really sat down to flesh out the idea any further yet, and I would like more feedback so I can try to make some interesting stories in this original universe. 

I have an idea about a world in which a multitude of mythologies from throughout history have suddenly popped into existence, through a series of cataclysmic interdimensional mergings known as Awakenings. Pantheons from around the world are now tangible, and they are immensely powerful. Japanese kami, Norse gods, and even the heroes of Greek and Roman legends have been forcibly brought into our plane of existence.

With these malevolent, supernatural entities wreaking havoc across the globe, a world government rose to power to fight the hordes of Myths, Gods, and Spirits, creating specialized task forces known as Watchmen (or Watchers) to hunt down the unnatural menace. A Great War ravages entire countries. The previous world order crumbles in a matter of months. Without the protection of the shadowy organization of Watchers, humanity was surely bound to perish. Yet our resilience held out, and we conquered the multitudes of Heavens and Hells, harnessing their raw and mysterious Spirit energy with fantastic machines and newly-discovered arcane rituals.

Years later, the world government (now known as The Overseers or The Protectors) has taken control over a vast portion of the world and is keeping the population in submission through subtle manipulation and constant promises of protection against the now-defeated Spirits. An Orwellian government is subduing any attempts to rebel, and even those Spirits which were peaceful and good are all but extinct.

A rebel movement of Spirit sympathizers scattered across the globe are secretly housing a few remaining Spirits in their homes, in an elaborate Underground Railroad. But the Watchmen are still in power, and they are on constant vigil for even the slightest sign of Spirit activity. Raids of private property are commonplace, and there are Reeducation Camps designed to brainwash uncooperative civilians in most major cities.

With humanity being controlled by the brutal Overseers, the few Spirits left are forced to hide in the homes of the kind humans who are part of the Underground Railroad. Underground bunkers are sometimes built to house these Spirits, but more often than not, they are captured by Watchmen raids and taken away, still "alive," to an unknown location. Even most of the Watchman officers don't know what happens to these Spirits, but they know it's unpleasant. With doubters among their ranks, some Watchmen are sympathetic to the cause of the Underground Railroad. These dissenters are swiftly rooted out and quietly executed.

I have plenty of issues to iron out, such as the sociopolitical and economic situations that allowed for the rise of a single unified government, but I feel like there's potential for plenty of interesting stories to tell in this universe. I've discussed my ideas briefly with a couple of published authors who specialize in worldbuilding, and they've given me some additional resources to flesh it out a bit more, but I'd like more feedback before I put more effort into this. What do you guys think?


Fronlaasfrin
February 2, 2018
This is good. I just have one question: the war you spoke of early on, was that between the humans and the Spirits, or more of a battle royal?
But seriously, this is an awesome idea. I can really see some potential here.
by Fronlaasfrin
February 2, 2018
This is good. I just have one question: the war you spoke of early on, was that between the humans and the Spirits, or more of a battle royal?

But seriously, this is an awesome idea. I can really see some potential here.

Fronlaasfrin
February 8, 2018

I'm working on a fantasy race, called the the "dniwocs". they are a short race, the tallest reaching 4' 3", with one singular eye in the center of their head, between where we have our two eyes. they have two, small leathery wings on their backs that allow them to fly. Their religion is centered around the first of their kind, whom they worship as a god. They live in a small parcel of land, called "Homeland" by them, where they have a fairly large city that takes up the most of the area of Homeland. Next to the city is a small pond and farm. The pond's water has a heavy concentration of nutrients, which they use in making their food, which they are famous for. They primarily use wind magic in everyday life and in combat.

They have 160 days in a year, but their month's have a total of 159 days. the last day is equivalent to a "New Year's Day", in which they celebrate the coming of the next year, the continuation or end of life, and anything they may have accomplished in the prior year. 

This is really all I have so far. If you have any questions or advice, please ask or give :)

by Fronlaasfrin
February 8, 2018

I'm working on a fantasy race, called the the "dniwocs". they are a short race, the tallest reaching 4' 3", with one singular eye in the center of their head, between where we have our two eyes. they have two, small leathery wings on their backs that allow them to fly. Their religion is centered around the first of their kind, whom they worship as a god. They live in a small parcel of land, called "Homeland" by them, where they have a fairly large city that takes up the most of the area of Homeland. Next to the city is a small pond and farm. The pond's water has a heavy concentration of nutrients, which they use in making their food, which they are famous for. They primarily use wind magic in everyday life and in combat.

They have 160 days in a year, but their month's have a total of 159 days. the last day is equivalent to a "New Year's Day", in which they celebrate the coming of the next year, the continuation or end of life, and anything they may have accomplished in the prior year. 

This is really all I have so far. If you have any questions or advice, please ask or give :)


Hahdremro
February 8, 2018
Fronlaasfrin
This is good. I just have one question: the war you spoke of early on, was that between the humans and the Spirits, or more of a battle royal? But seriously, this is an awesome idea. I can really see some potential here.

It was a Great War between humans and Spirits. During each Awakening, the war was rekindled and it's only through sheer force of will (and some brilliant tactics) that humanity prevailed in the end.

by Hahdremro
February 8, 2018
Fronlaasfrin
This is good. I just have one question: the war you spoke of early on, was that between the humans and the Spirits, or more of a battle royal? But seriously, this is an awesome idea. I can really see some potential here.

It was a Great War between humans and Spirits. During each Awakening, the war was rekindled and it's only through sheer force of will (and some brilliant tactics) that humanity prevailed in the end.


Hahdremro
February 8, 2018
Fronlaasfrin

They have 160 days in a year, but their month's have a total of 159 days. the last day is equivalent to a "New Year's Day", in which they celebrate the coming of the next year, the continuation or end of life, and anything they may have accomplished in the prior year. 

If that last day is still a day, then they have 160 days in their calendar. You might want to check that math or better explain the concept you're trying to convey.

by Hahdremro
February 8, 2018
Fronlaasfrin

They have 160 days in a year, but their month's have a total of 159 days. the last day is equivalent to a "New Year's Day", in which they celebrate the coming of the next year, the continuation or end of life, and anything they may have accomplished in the prior year. 

If that last day is still a day, then they have 160 days in their calendar. You might want to check that math or better explain the concept you're trying to convey.


Fronlaasfrin
February 27, 2018

Made another race, nothing like the Dniwocs, though. these people are called "Twinadactynes". They are crab-like people, but they have human-like skin. They have pincer-like hands as well, one being larger than the other. This trait is not inhereted from the parent, and is instead random. Their average height is 5' 8". They have no gender, instead being like plants with their smaller claw being a male part, and the larger being the female part. When nearing the end of their life, they become stiffer. They put their small hand inside their big hand, and after 4 months (at most), the Twinadactyne dies and the baby hatches from the big hand.

In recent times, a forming of clans inside the race occured. It was caused by a dispute of Twinadactynes with small left hands being different than Twinadactynes with small right hands. this split the race into two clans, and caused some small riots. Since then, the clans have reached peace (still disliking each other though) and have split into 7 small er clans each (14 smaller clans total) under the supervision of their House Clan.

If this isn't enough info, let me know. I can always answer any questions you have as well :)

by Fronlaasfrin
February 27, 2018

Made another race, nothing like the Dniwocs, though. these people are called "Twinadactynes". They are crab-like people, but they have human-like skin. They have pincer-like hands as well, one being larger than the other. This trait is not inhereted from the parent, and is instead random. Their average height is 5' 8". They have no gender, instead being like plants with their smaller claw being a male part, and the larger being the female part. When nearing the end of their life, they become stiffer. They put their small hand inside their big hand, and after 4 months (at most), the Twinadactyne dies and the baby hatches from the big hand.

In recent times, a forming of clans inside the race occured. It was caused by a dispute of Twinadactynes with small left hands being different than Twinadactynes with small right hands. this split the race into two clans, and caused some small riots. Since then, the clans have reached peace (still disliking each other though) and have split into 7 small er clans each (14 smaller clans total) under the supervision of their House Clan.

If this isn't enough info, let me know. I can always answer any questions you have as well :)


Hahdremro
February 27, 2018

@Vomirmun The whole concept seems surreal, almost reminiscent of the style of alien race that was so prevalent during the Golden Age of Science Fiction. With a bit of polish and detail, I feel like the Twinadactynes have a lot of potential. 

by Hahdremro
February 27, 2018

@Vomirmun The whole concept seems surreal, almost reminiscent of the style of alien race that was so prevalent during the Golden Age of Science Fiction. With a bit of polish and detail, I feel like the Twinadactynes have a lot of potential. 

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